Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Embarrassment and humiliation??? Anyone else? Erotic but yet discipline?

 
 
It has been awhile since I've posted here!  I hope everyone is doing great! 
 
 Things have been going well!   We have stayed on the DD path most of the time, but at times have had to put it on the back burner due to family issues that didn't allow us to do practice DD. 
 
When that happened we can/could really tell a big difference in our marriage! 
 
Recently we have had some long talks about getting our schedules back on track and making sure DD is well and alive in our marriage because it brings us so much closer!
 
Maybe you all can help me out with a few questions I have that I have also asked my dear owner about. 
 
What is the difference between DD and D/s? 
 
For some reasons while DD is painful, VERY painful and I don't want it, there is another part of me that does and that part finds it erotic.   Sometimes the spankings hurt so badly I can't keep still and I'm crying but yet sexual turned on?  Does anyone else have that issue? Or know why?
 
Which brings me to this next question when I'm being disciplined, corner time, in humiliating positions to help humble me or knock a chip off my shoulder, again I hate it because its so embarrassing, but it turns me on?  An example of this was recently dear owner had already spanked me and it wasn't enough, so I had to go in the closet and take off all my clothes and get on all 4 and he spread my legs and he spanked me.  To assert his authority he would rub on my bottom and I'm not suppose to move to show submission. (not in a sick way - but in a way to make him know that I am submitting and I'm his and I'm not going to fight him.)  The reason for this is because that is a humiliating position and it reduces my attitude and takes away pride that I am carrying around. (for me it works because when I tell him to stop or I squirm I get spanked more but usually by the time I not fighting him my attitude is gone and I'm in a better mood and very submissive)  For me it works because its so embarrassing because he can see everything and I can't move because its in the middle of discipline.  However what is embarrassing about it also is that it is making me "wet" and him feeling that or seeing that is embarrassing and humiliating.  Does that happen to anyone else?  Don't get me wrong, I hate it because of the embarrassment but it does work for my attitude or reminding me that I am his wife and my role in our marriage and who has authority. 
 
That also goes for corner time.  I have to stand there either naked or with my panties down and occasionally he will come up and touch me and if I move or say stop and swats my butt a few times really hard, and he will come back later and he tries again and I finally submit and by that time my attitude is gone and I am in back where I need to be and I feel like a better person.  Embarrassing!  So embarrassing but yet it also makes me "wet" and its so humiliating that my dear owner sees this and feels this.
 
*Please keep in mind that hubby only does these things because he has seen that it is what works with me.  When I have an attitude or need our roles reaffirmed, it takes the embarrassment and humiliation to bring me down, along with spankings. 
 
Is this degrading to what DD is about?  TTWD?  LDD?  Does this happen to other women?
 
Or does this qualify as D/s????? 
 
Thank you all so much for your support and answers that are to come!  I love it that I have a place I can come and blog and talk freely about these things!  Thank you!
 
~Jane

10 comments:

  1. I think that's totally hot. The humiliation aspect is absolutely part of the appeal of discipline. And whether you label it DD or D/S, you've chosen it because it turns you on to have this dynamic, ultimately, even if it's painful/embarrassing or even downright difficult in the moment.

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    1. Thank you Renee! :)

      It is! It is horrible! But yet something I know I need and we need as a couple...... But its meant for a reason.... Discipline, or maintenance, or reminders or just because - they are suppose to serve a purpose.... especially the discipline ones and that is to correct bad behavior and I feel like they shouldn't be a turn on.... especially when they hurt so bad! And how embarrassing they are...... and when hubby can see that its turned me on.... that is embarrassing...... I don't understand why I get turned on by it though..... I feel like its wrong...............

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    2. Again, Thank you Renee for stopping by and takin the time to try and answer my questions! :)

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    3. Jane it is natural to be turned on by spanking. You can either accept the humiliation that results as part of the punishment or up the severity of the spanking until the eroticism of the event ceases.

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  2. Jane I so understanding what you are saying it happens to me. I don't get many punishments but I get reassurance ones to remind me and assure me he is in charge and he constantly finds me wet and turned on it is so embarrassing to be found that way. Call it what you want. I say if you and hubby are happy then it doesn't matter what you call it and I am with Renee it sounds hot. Enjoy

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  3. Thanks for sharing this post with me. Presently, I'm not in a relationship but, when I was, it was D/s. At the time, he was happily frustrated that the very thing that was supposed to be discipline, was a turn-on to both of us. I didn't have to be embarrassed because it was more foreplay than punishment. Win/win! ;)

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  4. Jane, I don't know if this is DD or D/s or any other but I don't think it matters. The label is not important and each couple live out their lifestyle in a slightly different way, so what is DD to some may be D/s to others

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  5. When I was a teenager, the husband of one of our neighbors walked out on her after she refused to have sex with him. It wasn't common knowledge. I only found out in the process of her seducing me.

    One night, when she was being a bitch, I told her she needed a spanking. After some really awkward preliminaries in her living room, I wound up spanking her bare butt with her hairbrush in her bedroom! Despite complaining that she wouldn't be able to sit down the next morning a work, she wanted sex afterwards. She was wet and thoroughly submissive. When I was ready to leave, she gave me a big smile and told me to come back.

    Sometime later, after she became difficult once again, I told her to get over my knee. This time she didn't argue. After that spanking, though, she had tears in her eyes and was rubbing her butt like a spanked little girl. Before that moment, I had no idea that spanking could reduce a woman to a childlike state. .However, once she calmed down, she wanted to have sex. As before, she was thoroughly wet and totally submissive.

    The one thing that really surprise me was how even standing with her clothes off in front of a seat man holding a airbrush can turn even a shrew into a mouse. I've also been amazed by how almost effortlessly she will put herself over that man's knee even when she knows she might not be able to sit down comfortably afterwards. I've since concluded there is something in a woman's makeup that makes a badly behave woman want to get her butt beat and want to give herself to the man that does it. . .







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  6. This may be a different entry--but in our now long and happy marriage I get my bare butt paddled once in a while from my wife--It is totally consenting--Its always the same--certain conduct with my male friends of which my more religious and moral objects--We both know when a paddling has to happen--no argument I shower quick and bend over holding shins and she paddles me and it hurts alot but things are just fine once again between us-Since only my wife and I know--there is no shaming or embarrassment factor Other guys like me? I always though i was the only one-- presnalgregor@yahoo.com

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  7. This may be a different entry--but in our now long and happy marriage I get my bare butt paddled once in a while from my wife--It is totally consenting--Its always the same--certain conduct with my male friends of which my more religious and moral objects--We both know when a paddling has to happen--no argument I shower quick and bend over holding shins and she paddles me and it hurts alot but things are just fine once again between us-Since only my wife and I know--there is no shaming or embarrassment factor Other guys like me? I always though i was the only one-- presnalgregor@yahoo.com

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