Tuesday, February 25, 2014

TMI? Also update! :)

So here is a TMI question!  :)

What does your HOH do when you are on your period?

HOHs feel free to way in on this subject.

Does your HOH make YOU write down your rules you broke or issues you and your HOH have discussed that are not acceptable behavior for the week?  If so, is discipline administered all at the same time or does he spread it out over the following week?  Or just lump them all together?

Or does your HOH write them down?

Or does your HOH still discipline you while you are on your period?  (spanking, and corner time, all while naked?)  Or over panties?   Or panties just pulled down slightly?
If so, does he make you still undress?  
What if you are wearing a pad?

What is the standard procedure in your home for how your HOH handles it.

I am curious to see how other HOHs handle this.

On a brighter note, hubby said I was doing so good with my submission exercises but he was going to have to find something else creative to "test" my submission.   YIKES!   But I'm glad that I have been doing good!  I don't think he REALLY meant it, but rather joking around. 

Also, FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY during one of our submission exercises while he was touching me he rubbed/slid his fingers over my ummmhummm 'rear' hole and I was able to stand still.   He did it on 2 occasions during that one submission exercise and I stood still both times.  I am so private about that area, that hole I always claim is mine!  LOL  (Readers who follow my blog know my issues with this!)  After I let him finally touch me there and not move, I felt so much like I belonged to him.   I finally gave every inch of me to him.   Knowing that he touched me there brought me to another place in submission.  I can not put into words how it made me feel.   I was embarrassed while he had his fingers there, but also felt small and vulnerable to him, I felt his power and the fact that he owns every inch of me and it made me love him and want to submit to him even more.   It is a matter of trust.   Before he slid his fingers there he asked me if I trusted him, and I said yes, and he reminded me that he would never do anything to hurt me.    I have to say that was a very powerful moment for me.   It was very embarrassing, intimate, taking of my pride, the most submission I have felt, feelings of vulnerability, the feeling of his presence of power over me, making me feel soft, making me feminine, trusting him with every inch of my body, protected, loved, cherished, and owned.  So many mixed, wild, emotions and feelings from one (ok 2 that time) touch of such an intimate part of the body, and to me being able to stand still and give that over to my husband is the ultimate act of submission and trust.    (That is NOT to say that when he tries it again I will be able to be still, it will take time because it has taken a long time for these submission exercises for me to finally stand still and submit to him, but when I finally stop fighting him on it and let go the feelings is overwhelming, and you feel relieved)

However with that being said, last night when I was getting a spanking for a rule I broke, when he was rubbing my butt to see how hot it was he pulled my checks apart some and I told him to stop, and well, ummmm, not only did he do it again to prove a point, but I also managed to get my butt beat more.  :(    /sigh    Sooooo while I felt very good about the submission exercise, I mean VERY good about it, I guess that is something we still have to work on.    But that submission exercise and letting him finally put his finger there that one night was a huge step in the right place!   Submission all the way!

I hope everyone is having a fantastic Tuesday!


Thursday, February 20, 2014

Let me clear this up! :)

I believe in old fashioned values. 
For me in our marriage this means DD, TiH, TTWD. I used to think we were more D/s.  However, as time goes on and our TiH/DD relationship continues to grow through trial and error, we are finding what works for US, and we are realizing that we have a tendency to lean more towards TiH. But I do think its fair to say that we have a good mixture of all four with what works for us.    They are all about the same in some shape or form, they are all about having a head and being submissive the way we should.
Let me be very clear in my next statement.   I do not, and never have, and never will believe in BDSM.   This is my blog so I am voicing my thoughts.   :)     So if you come here to read I want you to know that straight up.  I will never advocate or post things like that here or in the community that I own.
I was looking back through my blog and I see some pictures and wording of some blogs that could make it seem we are way more leaning towards D/s.   But that is just not true, so I want to make sure I clear that up. Maybe at one time when finding "us" we did, but now I think we just have a very well rounded TiH relationship that covers a lot of many different things.    In the near future I will probably go back and remove some of those pictures and might even change the wording of some, or delete them all together.  
For me this is consensual domestic discipline within the confines of a marriage of a man and woman. 
(Below I found from another website and I think it sums it up perfectly!)
In today's world this is definitely not politically correct, but today's world isn't in such great shape is it?  What America needs is a full-fledged return to the values and morals this country was founded upon and that made it great.  The time when men were real men and being a submissive wife did not mean she was a doormat.  The strongest woman I know is the one who willingly places herself in subjection to her own husband despite his flaws.
So there you go!  

We test our HOH sometimes to see if they will stand their ground, but sometimes I think we are testing ourselves.

Dear Readers,   (a little different opening, huh? :) )

Most of us women in a DD marriage, (TiH) find at some point or another we test our HOH to see really who is STILL in control.   We want them to stand up to us and not let us walk all over them.

However I was thinking about this also, I believe at times I am really testing myself to see if I will actually submit in the quiet, sweet way that I should. 

There are times that I want to fight him on it. 

The way he has me positioned most of the time is on all fours with my legs spread and butt pushed out some.   I admit that sometimes, more often than not, I start arching my back trying to pull my butt down so it isn't just out there. 

At first its about the pain of the spanking but then at some point during the spanking I tell myself that I need to stop moving and be still and submit the way I should.   Granted this doesn't happen all the time. 

There have been times that after a spanking or corner time that I actually went back and asked him to redo it because I didn't feel like I submitted the way I should have, because I was either moving or giving him a hard time in some form.   The next time he does the repeat I try my hardest to be still and submit 110%!   I try not to move or anything. 

So I do think at times I a testing myself by testing him.    If I test him and he bites back I know what I got coming to me and it is a way for me to see if I am going to submit quietly the way I should.

We have blanket consent so it doesn't really matter, but I want to submit the way I should.  

Just something interesting I thought about and wanted to share. 


Friday, February 14, 2014

Big trouble tonight!

Hey fellow DDers!

I hope y'all had a wonderful last few days! How is everyone?

Us over on the east coast got slammed with Pax!  Ouch!  But all is well!

Well I am in big trouble tonight.   I really screwed up!  :(   I feel so bad about it!  Last night I sent my HOH a text because I was aggravated saying "what the hell" and he didn't respond to it.   So, I didn't think much of it.  Well, this morning I didn't get up when I was suppose to.   Later in the morning today I get a text saying tonight I have 10 minutes coming, spanking and corner time due to my text last night and not getting up this morning.  :(

So now here I sit dreading and thankful for the discipline I have coming.  It is deserved, but I dread it also.   :(

I sent him a text about how sorry I was/am and I will submit (obviously) to anything and everything because I deserve it and have it coming.   I can't wait to get the slate clean and we can have a good weekend.


Monday, February 10, 2014

Lets talk........................

Lets talk maintenance.

What are your thoughts on it?  What do you and your HOH do for maintenance if you do it?

Occasionally we do maintenance, however I personally think it should be done more often to keep me in a better frame of mind.   I know there are some cons to doing it but personally I feel the pros out number the cons.  HOH does it when he feels the need.  I personally feel it should be done more just because I know how I feel. 

I feel it serves so many good purposes, even though I hate it at the same time.   Sounds like I'm speaking out of both sides of my mouth, huh?   Yes spank me and put me in my place, but I hate it also.  Yes, put me in corner time and help me stay submissive, but don't touch me!   Crazy, huh? 

BDSM I/We have NO, NONE whatsoever of any interest in that.    We are firmly DD, TiH, CDD, and at times, though not often D/s with just the way some things come up.  

I feel that maintenance is a reminder to stay submissive, to remind me who is in charge, role affirmation.   If not attitude sneaks up and then I end up with discipline.   I think a few times a week is good, even if there is discipline involved, well then you have both because you knew it was maintenance, yet you earned discipline from not listening or breaking rules or sassing/talking back.

I think by nature us women have a need and want to be submissive to a powerful, strong man that can handle us.  However we need constant reminders/role affirmation because in this society we are taught so differently!   "Women stand up to your husband"  -  "Women you are equal to your husband" - "Women don't let anyone tell you what to do" - "Women pitch a fit to get what you want"  those are the things we hear or see on TV shows, commercials or even in various households among family and friends.

I feel maintenance should cover both a spanking and corner time.   Of course a less amount of time with each since it is just maintenance, but that is my views on it.   However at times my maintenance does turn to discipline.   So I dunno!  

Thoughts?   What do you do in your marriage?   I have already addressed this some in a few emails to other DDers.

HOH feels a bit differently about this than I do. 

Also, as I have mentioned in a few emails to other DDers.   What do you do if your HOH is not strict enough?   I'm not saying my HOH is not strict enough by any means!  LOL   (HOH if you are reading this which I know you do sometimes - YOU are strict!  LOL  I ♥ You)   I'm curious to see how you ladies handle that?  HOH makes the rules, but does he enforce them without any slack?  Do you wish he was stricter?  Or was firmer?
What other things does your HOH do for discipline? Or Role Affirmation to keep you in a submissive state? 
We have done:
Spanking of course
Corner time
Corner time always has submission exercises
Writing lines
No panties for the day
A few times disciplining  me in a different position that exposes more than I would like
Ok!   Hugs to all my DDers!  
If you do not agree with any of the above, that is more than fine.   Please refrain from posting ridiculous comments here.  If you don't agree you may simply put that but you don't need to go into the personal attacks because that is just not called for.    Thanks!

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Did you have a good weekend?

First thing first!  I want to thank the few of you that have sent me some very kind helpful emails!   :)   I will be responding soon!

I hope your family has had a fabulous weekend.   We did!

Sadly tomorrow is Monday and HOH has to go back to work. :(

Question, do any of your write poetry?  I am working on one about DD life.  I will post it when it's done.   I am going to be including it in the ebook!

We have company coming over in a bit and hubby has already threatened to take me back to our bedroom and spank me if I get to a point that he doesn't like.  Yikes!!    Well, that ain't going to happen!  Ha!  I'm not getting in trouble and take the chance of them hearing!

Well, another beautiful weekend!  



Thursday, February 6, 2014

I am dreading tonight. :(

I am so dreading tonight!

As I posted below I have 5 or 7 minutes, I can't remember of a spanking and corner time.   :(

It amazes me how far we have come with this lifestyle and it just being the normal. 

It went from a few swats with a small, thin wooden spoon, to minutes and minutes of me on all 4 getting my rear wore out with a thick wooden spoon or whip thingy, or his belt.   He has gone from barely tapping my rear with that small spoon in the beginning to the point of seeing my butt glow because he knows why he is doing it, and lets just say he doesn't swat anymore.  He wears my butt out!  The rear is a place meant for spankings and he doesn't hold back that much.   

Plus the dreaded corner time I posted about below.  :(

Tonight is going to be horrible!   :(    But I will submit and I know I have it coming.   I also know he loves me and he is doing it out of love and after we will snuggle and watch TV together with the HOH who protects me, loves me, and will not let me run all over him.   My man who takes charge and is not afraid to put me in my place. 

I love him so much!   (But dreading tonight's discipline!)

I will post back tomorrow!

~  Jane