I'm here and I don't know what to say.
This lifestyle works for us! Every time we implement it, it works!
Then somehow we get off track.
When we do I start feeling unbalanced. I find myself not paying attention to the rules that were ONCE there, and letting my mind wonder and not respecting my HOH as much.
I don't like this.
I have brought it back up to my HOH but I hate being the one to bring it up. :(
Does anyone feel the need to have TiH, DD, CDD, LDD lifestyle to feel like you BELONG to your HOH?
Maybe it's because of some past, recent issues I have been dealing with but I need that foundation, structure, feeling secure and like I belong to someone and they are going to protect me.
I have done so much research on this lifestyle and even though we KNOW it works for us, why can't we stick to it?
We do good for months and then slip.
I was just about to write an ebook on it to help other couples starting out on this lifestyle, and that is still what I want to do.
With the above questions, how do you feel about the feeling of belonging to him?
~Jane (Sorry I have been MIA)
Showing posts with label CDD. Show all posts
Showing posts with label CDD. Show all posts
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Thursday, March 6, 2014
I was 1 1/2 hours late!
I was 1 1/2 hours late. Yikes!
First off so you can understand what I am talking about. HOH has a rule that from 10-12 I am to stay off the computer.
Well yesterday I didn't. I was 1 1/2 hours late!
I paid for it with my butt!
When I told him, I did it Via text. (LOL - most of you wives out there know that is the easiest way sometimes LOL)
The text I got back was one I could tell he was upset.
I thought he would be find with me going over since it is a 2 hour block and I think/feel like that 2 hours can be at any time.
I learned the hard way.
He said his house will run like clockwork one day, and that if he could come home right then he would and whip my butt. You see I have horrible time management!
If I am just 1 minute late on something then I get in trouble, so you can see that me being 1 1/2 hours was NOT good!
I was told to remove my panties for the next 2 hours. Which he knows I hate, and I told him that yesterday because it makes me stay wet and it drives me nuts!
Then when he got home I had to get in the corner and then I got very thoroughly spanked!
He told me that he is not going by minutes any longer, just by the glow of my butt! LOL
So today I am trying really hard to be careful!
Oh yeah, something I forgot and thank goodness HOH let it pass. I got a ticket the other day for not wearing my seat belt. When I told him he was right away saying you will get a whipping for that because I tell you to put your seat belt on all the time. Well, since this was my very first ticket and ever being pulled over, he let me off the hook. Thank goodness! However I know now that even without a ticket, that if I am ever in a vehicle without my seat belt on I am going to be disciplined for it.
So, that has been my last few days.
Jane
First off so you can understand what I am talking about. HOH has a rule that from 10-12 I am to stay off the computer.
Well yesterday I didn't. I was 1 1/2 hours late!
I paid for it with my butt!
When I told him, I did it Via text. (LOL - most of you wives out there know that is the easiest way sometimes LOL)
The text I got back was one I could tell he was upset.
I thought he would be find with me going over since it is a 2 hour block and I think/feel like that 2 hours can be at any time.
I learned the hard way.
He said his house will run like clockwork one day, and that if he could come home right then he would and whip my butt. You see I have horrible time management!
If I am just 1 minute late on something then I get in trouble, so you can see that me being 1 1/2 hours was NOT good!
I was told to remove my panties for the next 2 hours. Which he knows I hate, and I told him that yesterday because it makes me stay wet and it drives me nuts!
Then when he got home I had to get in the corner and then I got very thoroughly spanked!
He told me that he is not going by minutes any longer, just by the glow of my butt! LOL
So today I am trying really hard to be careful!
Oh yeah, something I forgot and thank goodness HOH let it pass. I got a ticket the other day for not wearing my seat belt. When I told him he was right away saying you will get a whipping for that because I tell you to put your seat belt on all the time. Well, since this was my very first ticket and ever being pulled over, he let me off the hook. Thank goodness! However I know now that even without a ticket, that if I am ever in a vehicle without my seat belt on I am going to be disciplined for it.
So, that has been my last few days.
Jane
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
TMI? Also update! :)
So here is a TMI question! :)
What does your HOH do when you are on your period?
HOHs feel free to way in on this subject.
Does your HOH make YOU write down your rules you broke or issues you and your HOH have discussed that are not acceptable behavior for the week? If so, is discipline administered all at the same time or does he spread it out over the following week? Or just lump them all together?
Or does your HOH write them down?
Or does your HOH still discipline you while you are on your period? (spanking, and corner time, all while naked?) Or over panties? Or panties just pulled down slightly?
If so, does he make you still undress?
What if you are wearing a pad?
What is the standard procedure in your home for how your HOH handles it.
I am curious to see how other HOHs handle this.
On a brighter note, hubby said I was doing so good with my submission exercises but he was going to have to find something else creative to "test" my submission. YIKES! But I'm glad that I have been doing good! I don't think he REALLY meant it, but rather joking around.
Also, FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY during one of our submission exercises while he was touching me he rubbed/slid his fingers over my ummmhummm 'rear' hole and I was able to stand still. He did it on 2 occasions during that one submission exercise and I stood still both times. I am so private about that area, that hole I always claim is mine! LOL (Readers who follow my blog know my issues with this!) After I let him finally touch me there and not move, I felt so much like I belonged to him. I finally gave every inch of me to him. Knowing that he touched me there brought me to another place in submission. I can not put into words how it made me feel. I was embarrassed while he had his fingers there, but also felt small and vulnerable to him, I felt his power and the fact that he owns every inch of me and it made me love him and want to submit to him even more. It is a matter of trust. Before he slid his fingers there he asked me if I trusted him, and I said yes, and he reminded me that he would never do anything to hurt me. I have to say that was a very powerful moment for me. It was very embarrassing, intimate, taking of my pride, the most submission I have felt, feelings of vulnerability, the feeling of his presence of power over me, making me feel soft, making me feminine, trusting him with every inch of my body, protected, loved, cherished, and owned. So many mixed, wild, emotions and feelings from one (ok 2 that time) touch of such an intimate part of the body, and to me being able to stand still and give that over to my husband is the ultimate act of submission and trust. (That is NOT to say that when he tries it again I will be able to be still, it will take time because it has taken a long time for these submission exercises for me to finally stand still and submit to him, but when I finally stop fighting him on it and let go the feelings is overwhelming, and you feel relieved)
However with that being said, last night when I was getting a spanking for a rule I broke, when he was rubbing my butt to see how hot it was he pulled my checks apart some and I told him to stop, and well, ummmm, not only did he do it again to prove a point, but I also managed to get my butt beat more. :( /sigh Sooooo while I felt very good about the submission exercise, I mean VERY good about it, I guess that is something we still have to work on. But that submission exercise and letting him finally put his finger there that one night was a huge step in the right place! Submission all the way!
I hope everyone is having a fantastic Tuesday!
~Jane
What does your HOH do when you are on your period?
HOHs feel free to way in on this subject.
Does your HOH make YOU write down your rules you broke or issues you and your HOH have discussed that are not acceptable behavior for the week? If so, is discipline administered all at the same time or does he spread it out over the following week? Or just lump them all together?
Or does your HOH write them down?
Or does your HOH still discipline you while you are on your period? (spanking, and corner time, all while naked?) Or over panties? Or panties just pulled down slightly?
If so, does he make you still undress?
What if you are wearing a pad?
What is the standard procedure in your home for how your HOH handles it.
I am curious to see how other HOHs handle this.
On a brighter note, hubby said I was doing so good with my submission exercises but he was going to have to find something else creative to "test" my submission. YIKES! But I'm glad that I have been doing good! I don't think he REALLY meant it, but rather joking around.
Also, FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY during one of our submission exercises while he was touching me he rubbed/slid his fingers over my ummmhummm 'rear' hole and I was able to stand still. He did it on 2 occasions during that one submission exercise and I stood still both times. I am so private about that area, that hole I always claim is mine! LOL (Readers who follow my blog know my issues with this!) After I let him finally touch me there and not move, I felt so much like I belonged to him. I finally gave every inch of me to him. Knowing that he touched me there brought me to another place in submission. I can not put into words how it made me feel. I was embarrassed while he had his fingers there, but also felt small and vulnerable to him, I felt his power and the fact that he owns every inch of me and it made me love him and want to submit to him even more. It is a matter of trust. Before he slid his fingers there he asked me if I trusted him, and I said yes, and he reminded me that he would never do anything to hurt me. I have to say that was a very powerful moment for me. It was very embarrassing, intimate, taking of my pride, the most submission I have felt, feelings of vulnerability, the feeling of his presence of power over me, making me feel soft, making me feminine, trusting him with every inch of my body, protected, loved, cherished, and owned. So many mixed, wild, emotions and feelings from one (ok 2 that time) touch of such an intimate part of the body, and to me being able to stand still and give that over to my husband is the ultimate act of submission and trust. (That is NOT to say that when he tries it again I will be able to be still, it will take time because it has taken a long time for these submission exercises for me to finally stand still and submit to him, but when I finally stop fighting him on it and let go the feelings is overwhelming, and you feel relieved)
However with that being said, last night when I was getting a spanking for a rule I broke, when he was rubbing my butt to see how hot it was he pulled my checks apart some and I told him to stop, and well, ummmm, not only did he do it again to prove a point, but I also managed to get my butt beat more. :( /sigh Sooooo while I felt very good about the submission exercise, I mean VERY good about it, I guess that is something we still have to work on. But that submission exercise and letting him finally put his finger there that one night was a huge step in the right place! Submission all the way!
I hope everyone is having a fantastic Tuesday!
~Jane
Thursday, February 20, 2014
We test our HOH sometimes to see if they will stand their ground, but sometimes I think we are testing ourselves.
Dear Readers, (a little different opening, huh? :) )
Most of us women in a DD marriage, (TiH) find at some point or another we test our HOH to see really who is STILL in control. We want them to stand up to us and not let us walk all over them.
However I was thinking about this also, I believe at times I am really testing myself to see if I will actually submit in the quiet, sweet way that I should.
There are times that I want to fight him on it.
The way he has me positioned most of the time is on all fours with my legs spread and butt pushed out some. I admit that sometimes, more often than not, I start arching my back trying to pull my butt down so it isn't just out there.
At first its about the pain of the spanking but then at some point during the spanking I tell myself that I need to stop moving and be still and submit the way I should. Granted this doesn't happen all the time.
There have been times that after a spanking or corner time that I actually went back and asked him to redo it because I didn't feel like I submitted the way I should have, because I was either moving or giving him a hard time in some form. The next time he does the repeat I try my hardest to be still and submit 110%! I try not to move or anything.
So I do think at times I a testing myself by testing him. If I test him and he bites back I know what I got coming to me and it is a way for me to see if I am going to submit quietly the way I should.
We have blanket consent so it doesn't really matter, but I want to submit the way I should.
Just something interesting I thought about and wanted to share.
Jane
Most of us women in a DD marriage, (TiH) find at some point or another we test our HOH to see really who is STILL in control. We want them to stand up to us and not let us walk all over them.
However I was thinking about this also, I believe at times I am really testing myself to see if I will actually submit in the quiet, sweet way that I should.
There are times that I want to fight him on it.
The way he has me positioned most of the time is on all fours with my legs spread and butt pushed out some. I admit that sometimes, more often than not, I start arching my back trying to pull my butt down so it isn't just out there.
At first its about the pain of the spanking but then at some point during the spanking I tell myself that I need to stop moving and be still and submit the way I should. Granted this doesn't happen all the time.
There have been times that after a spanking or corner time that I actually went back and asked him to redo it because I didn't feel like I submitted the way I should have, because I was either moving or giving him a hard time in some form. The next time he does the repeat I try my hardest to be still and submit 110%! I try not to move or anything.
So I do think at times I a testing myself by testing him. If I test him and he bites back I know what I got coming to me and it is a way for me to see if I am going to submit quietly the way I should.
We have blanket consent so it doesn't really matter, but I want to submit the way I should.
Just something interesting I thought about and wanted to share.
Jane
Friday, February 14, 2014
Big trouble tonight!
I hope y'all had a wonderful last few days! How is everyone?
Us over on the east coast got slammed with Pax! Ouch! But all is well!
Well I am in big trouble tonight. I really screwed up! :( I feel so bad about it! Last night I sent my HOH a text because I was aggravated saying "what the hell" and he didn't respond to it. So, I didn't think much of it. Well, this morning I didn't get up when I was suppose to. Later in the morning today I get a text saying tonight I have 10 minutes coming, spanking and corner time due to my text last night and not getting up this morning. :(
So now here I sit dreading and thankful for the discipline I have coming. It is deserved, but I dread it also. :(
I sent him a text about how sorry I was/am and I will submit (obviously) to anything and everything because I deserve it and have it coming. I can't wait to get the slate clean and we can have a good weekend.
Jane
Thursday, February 6, 2014
I am dreading tonight. :(
I am so dreading tonight!
As I posted below I have 5 or 7 minutes, I can't remember of a spanking and corner time. :(
It amazes me how far we have come with this lifestyle and it just being the normal.
It went from a few swats with a small, thin wooden spoon, to minutes and minutes of me on all 4 getting my rear wore out with a thick wooden spoon or whip thingy, or his belt. He has gone from barely tapping my rear with that small spoon in the beginning to the point of seeing my butt glow because he knows why he is doing it, and lets just say he doesn't swat anymore. He wears my butt out! The rear is a place meant for spankings and he doesn't hold back that much.
Plus the dreaded corner time I posted about below. :(
Tonight is going to be horrible! :( But I will submit and I know I have it coming. I also know he loves me and he is doing it out of love and after we will snuggle and watch TV together with the HOH who protects me, loves me, and will not let me run all over him. My man who takes charge and is not afraid to put me in my place.
I love him so much! (But dreading tonight's discipline!)
I will post back tomorrow!
~ Jane
As I posted below I have 5 or 7 minutes, I can't remember of a spanking and corner time. :(
It amazes me how far we have come with this lifestyle and it just being the normal.
It went from a few swats with a small, thin wooden spoon, to minutes and minutes of me on all 4 getting my rear wore out with a thick wooden spoon or whip thingy, or his belt. He has gone from barely tapping my rear with that small spoon in the beginning to the point of seeing my butt glow because he knows why he is doing it, and lets just say he doesn't swat anymore. He wears my butt out! The rear is a place meant for spankings and he doesn't hold back that much.
Plus the dreaded corner time I posted about below. :(
Tonight is going to be horrible! :( But I will submit and I know I have it coming. I also know he loves me and he is doing it out of love and after we will snuggle and watch TV together with the HOH who protects me, loves me, and will not let me run all over him. My man who takes charge and is not afraid to put me in my place.
I love him so much! (But dreading tonight's discipline!)
I will post back tomorrow!
~ Jane
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
So we meet again wooden spoon!
Well HOH caught me coming out of the shower still wet and I got 6 minutes with the thick wooden spoon. After it was done he asked me to do something and I told him no, (why did I do that??? I mean I was still standing here naked!!!) and he told me to bend over for another minute with the spoon! He wanted me to come look at my butt to enforce the discipline but I didn't want to. Tonight is another 6 minutes and Thursday is 7 minutes. I don't mean to be disrespectful - it just happens! Right now I'm being disciplined big time for being very disrespectful a few days back! I got to learn to keep mouth in check!
Sore bottom,
Jane
Sore bottom,
Jane
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