I was 1 1/2 hours late!

I was 1 1/2 hours late.   Yikes!

First off so you can understand what I am talking about.   HOH has a rule that from 10-12 I am to stay off the computer.  

Well yesterday I didn't.   I was 1 1/2 hours late! 

I paid for it with my butt! 

When I told him, I did it Via text.   (LOL - most of you wives out there know that is the easiest way sometimes LOL) 

The text I got back was one I could tell he was upset.

I thought he would be find with me going over since it is a 2 hour block and I think/feel like that 2 hours can be at any time.  

I learned the hard way.

He said his house will run like clockwork one day, and that if he could come home right then he would and whip my butt.    You see I have horrible time management! 

If I am just 1 minute late on something then I get in trouble, so you can see that me being 1 1/2 hours was NOT good!

I was told to remove my panties for the next 2 hours.  Which he knows I hate, and I told him that yesterday because it makes me stay wet and it drives me nuts!

Then when he got home I had to get in the corner and then I got very thoroughly spanked! 

He told me that he is not going by minutes any longer, just by the glow of my butt!  LOL  

So today I am trying really hard to be careful!

Oh yeah, something I forgot and thank goodness HOH let it pass.  I got a ticket the other day for not wearing my seat belt.   When I told him he was right away saying you will get a whipping for that because I tell you to put your seat belt on all the time.    Well,  since this was my very first ticket and ever being pulled over, he let me off the hook.   Thank goodness!     However I know now that even without a ticket, that if I am ever in a vehicle without my seat belt on I am going to be disciplined for it.   


So, that has been my last few days.  

Jane

TMI? Also update! :)

So here is a TMI question!  :)

What does your HOH do when you are on your period?

HOHs feel free to way in on this subject.

Does your HOH make YOU write down your rules you broke or issues you and your HOH have discussed that are not acceptable behavior for the week?  If so, is discipline administered all at the same time or does he spread it out over the following week?  Or just lump them all together?

Or does your HOH write them down?

Or does your HOH still discipline you while you are on your period?  (spanking, and corner time, all while naked?)  Or over panties?   Or panties just pulled down slightly?
If so, does he make you still undress?  
What if you are wearing a pad?

What is the standard procedure in your home for how your HOH handles it.

I am curious to see how other HOHs handle this.

On a brighter note, hubby said I was doing so good with my submission exercises but he was going to have to find something else creative to "test" my submission.   YIKES!   But I'm glad that I have been doing good!  I don't think he REALLY meant it, but rather joking around. 

Also, FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY during one of our submission exercises while he was touching me he rubbed/slid his fingers over my ummmhummm 'rear' hole and I was able to stand still.   He did it on 2 occasions during that one submission exercise and I stood still both times.  I am so private about that area, that hole I always claim is mine!  LOL  (Readers who follow my blog know my issues with this!)  After I let him finally touch me there and not move, I felt so much like I belonged to him.   I finally gave every inch of me to him.   Knowing that he touched me there brought me to another place in submission.  I can not put into words how it made me feel.   I was embarrassed while he had his fingers there, but also felt small and vulnerable to him, I felt his power and the fact that he owns every inch of me and it made me love him and want to submit to him even more.   It is a matter of trust.   Before he slid his fingers there he asked me if I trusted him, and I said yes, and he reminded me that he would never do anything to hurt me.    I have to say that was a very powerful moment for me.   It was very embarrassing, intimate, taking of my pride, the most submission I have felt, feelings of vulnerability, the feeling of his presence of power over me, making me feel soft, making me feminine, trusting him with every inch of my body, protected, loved, cherished, and owned.  So many mixed, wild, emotions and feelings from one (ok 2 that time) touch of such an intimate part of the body, and to me being able to stand still and give that over to my husband is the ultimate act of submission and trust.    (That is NOT to say that when he tries it again I will be able to be still, it will take time because it has taken a long time for these submission exercises for me to finally stand still and submit to him, but when I finally stop fighting him on it and let go the feelings is overwhelming, and you feel relieved)

However with that being said, last night when I was getting a spanking for a rule I broke, when he was rubbing my butt to see how hot it was he pulled my checks apart some and I told him to stop, and well, ummmm, not only did he do it again to prove a point, but I also managed to get my butt beat more.  :(    /sigh    Sooooo while I felt very good about the submission exercise, I mean VERY good about it, I guess that is something we still have to work on.    But that submission exercise and letting him finally put his finger there that one night was a huge step in the right place!   Submission all the way!

I hope everyone is having a fantastic Tuesday!

~Jane

Big trouble tonight!

Hey fellow DDers!

I hope y'all had a wonderful last few days! How is everyone?

Us over on the east coast got slammed with Pax!  Ouch!  But all is well!

Well I am in big trouble tonight.   I really screwed up!  :(   I feel so bad about it!  Last night I sent my HOH a text because I was aggravated saying "what the hell" and he didn't respond to it.   So, I didn't think much of it.  Well, this morning I didn't get up when I was suppose to.   Later in the morning today I get a text saying tonight I have 10 minutes coming, spanking and corner time due to my text last night and not getting up this morning.  :(

So now here I sit dreading and thankful for the discipline I have coming.  It is deserved, but I dread it also.   :(

I sent him a text about how sorry I was/am and I will submit (obviously) to anything and everything because I deserve it and have it coming.   I can't wait to get the slate clean and we can have a good weekend.

Jane

Did you have a good weekend?

First thing first!  I want to thank the few of you that have sent me some very kind helpful emails!   :)   I will be responding soon!

I hope your family has had a fabulous weekend.   We did!

Sadly tomorrow is Monday and HOH has to go back to work. :(

Question, do any of your write poetry?  I am working on one about DD life.  I will post it when it's done.   I am going to be including it in the ebook!

We have company coming over in a bit and hubby has already threatened to take me back to our bedroom and spank me if I get to a point that he doesn't like.  Yikes!!    Well, that ain't going to happen!  Ha!  I'm not getting in trouble and take the chance of them hearing!

Well, another beautiful weekend!  

((Hugs))

Jane

Help? Suggestions? Addiction?

So finally all my discipline spanking and corner time is over!!   Phew!!

That's was a rough discipline!

I made something for hubby so that shouldn't happen again.   I will post a picture of it later, but it's quiet and hurts!  :(    But I really don't like discipline dragging out.

Question - do any of you/or have any of you had a drinking addiction?  If so, is there a way DD can help?   I do have an addiction to alcohol and trying to control it.  Any suggestions where DD can help? HOH told me to do some research on it.  It is an addiction and I want to break it.

Can DD help? More spankings? Different discipline? Things that are humiliating to enforce that I need to break this addiction?  I dunno!  We are open to suggestions.

Jane

                                                      Should this be our answer??

So we meet again wooden spoon!

Well HOH caught me coming out of the shower still wet and I got 6 minutes with the thick wooden spoon.     After it was done he asked me to do something and I told him no, (why did I do that??? I mean I was still standing here naked!!!) and he told me to bend over for another minute with the spoon! He wanted me to come look at my butt to enforce the discipline but I didn't want to.     Tonight is another 6 minutes and Thursday is 7 minutes.    I don't mean to be disrespectful - it just happens! Right now I'm being disciplined big time for being very disrespectful a few days back!  I got to learn to keep mouth in check! 

Sore bottom,
Jane

 

 

 

Long blog, sorry.

So I posted a few days ago about what was coming up today, "the big spanking" for disrespect. He wanted to wait on Tuesday (today) because of my period.  Well I talked to HOH a few days ago and asked him if he would please break it up over a few days, and he said he would think about it.   He finally told me that he would break it up for me. That disrespect the other day earned me 21 minutes, and not an easy 21 minutes. (that's not including anything I might get in trouble for)  He told me I wouldn't be able to sit for a week.   (That was when he was going to do it all on Tuesday.)

Plus, this spanking has been coming for a few days from when I acted disrespectful, and I feel bad for the disrespect.  It has just been lingering over my head, I felt/feel bad, and I needed to submit.  I needed some sort of discipline to start easing the guilt for my actions, to show him that I respect him and his power over me.  So I sent him some text messages explaining that.  I told him I would submit to any discipline action, no matter how humiliating and to please not wait until Tuesday. 

So last night I was working out and wasn't home, and that part was fine.  However we also had unexpected/expected (at the last minute) company last night.  So I come home, still sweaty and my back end cold and instantly he takes me into the other room and knew it was for some sort of discipline.  I kept telling him I needed a shower first and he said he knew that.  That didn't stop him, because of my text messages  and also due to the circumstances of having company, he was going to go through with giving me some sort of discipline. Which I am grateful to him for.   He told me to pull down my pants and panties ( because of limited time he didn't make me fully undress) and bend over.  (which I did, there was something in front of me to grab)  He took that wooden spoon and for 2 minutes gave me a good, hard, solid, deserved spanking. I think about 30 seconds into it I was crying because it hurt.  I kept reminding myself that it was deserved and it was for my disrespect and he didn't deserve that from me and that this is some of my discipline for it.  

So that took 2 minutes off of my 21 so far for the week.  So if I can manage to keep my mouth shut and follow the rules I have 19 minutes left for the disrespect.  

I have to say that I truly, with all my heart, love our DD, TiH, TTWD lifestyle/relationship.

It changes who each of us are in our relationship.  He is more dominant now than ever, (even before we fell off the wagon for a few months and restarted a few weeks ago) and I am more submissive and each day we are growing more and more into our roles.    We know our roles, we know who we are in our marriage.   It makes for a peaceful household, but also makes up so much more closer.

Yes, should I be submissive anyway?  Do I need the threaten of a spanking or whatever humiliating discipline he comes up with to "fit the infraction?"  Do I need this lifestyle to respect him?   The answer to these questions are yes, and no.

Yes I want to be submissive, but no its not easy.  Today we live in a world that women have to act equal and we simply are not.   That doesn't mean we are "lower" or a doormat, it means that the HOH  makes the rules and we abide by them.   

Do I need a threaten of a spanking?  Yes.  Because again we live in a world that forces it down your  throat to not answer to anyone.  So yes I need the threat of a spanking or some sort of discipline to keeps me in check reminding me that I do have someone to answer to, and that is my HOH.   I know my husband loves me enough to make sure that happens. 

I respect my HOH with or without this lifestyle.   However, my respect for my HOH grew by leaps and bounds when we started this lifestyle a year ago.  Then when we fell off the wagon for a couple of months, it was still there but not as strong, but still there nonetheless.   Now that we are back full force with our lifestyle, and that respect for him as a man, my owner, the HOH is deeper and stronger than it has EVER been.  

I love him more and more, and feel closer to him than ever.  I am his, and he takes care of me.  He loves me for everything that I am, and I love him!   I am not easy to handle, I am strong willed, sarcastic, and sassy, so his job is not easy, but he does it. 

So tonight it's 5-7 minutes of spanking for just that, and I hope I don't get into any other trouble or it will be longer, and this time we don't have any company so I know it will be worse.  I know it will be the entire spanking process, undressing and getting into position. 

While I am dreading it big time, (so dreading it)  I am also thankful for it because I want this discipline to go away along with that episode of horrible disrespect.  Once the final 21 minutes is over this week then I can stop feeling guilty about acting horrible to my HOH........until next time I run off at the mouth. 

I am the sort of person that runs off at the mouth first before thinking and that is what gets me in trouble, along with time management.    With that being said, I need to close out this blog before I get into more trouble. 

~Jane

Thoughts on the Draw to Domestic Discipline: Why Do I Want to be Punished?

Interesting article I found somewhere that is so informative! 

This is told by other women who desire DD that it helped them explain to their husbands why they wanted a DD relationship.

  
I think the questions "Why would I want this?” and “What is wrong with me?" are very common among those of us who desire domestic discipline.“Why would I want my husband to spank me?”

“Why would I want to spank my wife?”

Often, we women read about men who are "man enough" to stand up to their Subs, and care about them enough to make them behave, to protect their relationship, and to lead. We read about being dominated and many of us think, "Wow, that sounds kind of hot!" We read about men who have no problem taking their girls over their knees and showing them who's boss. And we think..."I want that." 

We know that Domestic Discipline goes beyond the bedroom. Although many will admit there is an erotic element to DD, we know that it goes deeper than that. And sometimes, we are unsure as to why we would desire such a dynamic to begin with. 

There is peace in submitting to the man you love. Knowing he is in charge and won't let things go astray makes us feel loved. Being spanked is a major display of dominance and submission. Being taken in hand is hot, though being punished still hurts. It's all wrapped up together.

But it's all rooted in our desire to be loved. 

Let's take a look at a typical interaction with the average couple, and the same interaction from the Domestic Discipline perspective.

A woman gets into an argument with her husband. She's tired, she's cranky, and she's had a long day. She stomps her foot and slams something on the counter. His temper flares. He says some things he may or may not mean. He tells her he's had it, and he storms out of the house. She feels guilty. She feels abandoned. How could someone who loves her just leave like that? He doesn't have to leave the house to have the same effect. Maybe he's cold to her, or won't talk to her. She still has that feeling of being disconnected, abandoned, even unloved. As time goes on...and it could be hours, or longer...she realizes she's behaved terribly, and she feels guilty. She also feels hurt. What an awful end to an awful day. He comes home and they may or may not make up, but there's a bridge between the two of them. She still feels guilty.

Now, let's take a look at the same scenario with Domestic Discipline. A woman gets into an argument with her husband. She's tired, she's cranky, and she's had an awful day. She finally says something nasty and maybe in a fit of anger she stomps her foot, or slams something on the counter. He calmly and deliberately takes her by the arm, hauls her over his lap, and spanks her soundly. She feels the fight go out of her and has no choice but to submit. She feels humbled. When the fight is no longer in her anymore, he holds her. He tells her he forgives her and loves her. Maybe she feels something in her give way, and she cries. She feels forgiven. She knows he loves her enough to stop the fit, and to restore the peace in their relationship. Later, she thinks about how strong and masculine her husband was, and she realizes not only does she have a new-found respect, but she also finds his manliness more attractive.  

Does she actually like to be spanked? Yes and no. Being punished hurts, and the knowledge that she's done something wrong is uncomfortable. We're not talking about “spanking for fun” here, and this is where many who desire Domestic Discipline become confused. Why would someone choose to be punished?

We desire being taken in hand because we want to feel loved, not because we want to be punished. Those who dominate seek to protect and care for their submissive partner, even when that protection means to protect us from ourselves. We want that intimate connection.

Spanking survey! Interesting!

 

 

1.) Was there a certain event from your life, that sparked the spanking interest? If so, feel free to share:

We hit a bad spot in our marriage that almost left us in a divorce and me and him almost cheating on each other. You see I've always been bossy, and need to have things my way.  I never mean to be selfish, but I stay in control and want to do things a certain way.   However at same time I want to be told what to do, dominated, and have someone take care of me.  At the time my husband didn't do that.  I felt like I could walk all over him, and I did.  I wanted to know there is someone that is bigger, stronger, in control, and can handle my stubborn attitude.  I wanted to know there is someone that will say "No, you can't do that" or "Don't talk to me like that" and wasn't afraid to back it up with a spanking if I didn't listen, even by force if needed if I decided to fight.   I needed and longed for someone that would protect me from everything in this world, including myself, someone that loved me enough.    That is what my Owner/HOH has become! He is not the boy I married, he is now THE MAN I married!  :)
 
2.) What do you most often call your HOH/Spanker? (Sir, Master, etc.)

 Owner at different times, but mostly his name.  However when he is disciplining me or maintenance he makes sure that I say "Yes Sir" and he repeats and makes sure I acknowledge that he is my owner.

3.) What does your HOH/Spanker most often call you? (Young Lady, Girl, etc)

My girl, and good girl. (when I'm good)

 4.) We're building a big spanko bonfire, which one implement are you bringing to toss in?

Either the belt or the thick wooden spoon he has. 

 5.) We all know how many punishments there are to choose from; spanking, lecturing, corner time, etc.. but what about rewards? Do you have a favorite 'reward' that is used? If not, what's something you'd like used as a reward?

I don't need a "reward" because the "reward" is that I have the man I've needed my entire life, and with DD I become the woman (lady, girl) he needs that respects him and it gives our relationship a whole new meaning.  That is our reward.

 6.) What's that one phrase, that when it's used, you know you're in trouble?

He hasn't come up with one yet.  Usually its just a given that I've crossed a line and later I am going to be in the closet, in the garage in the car, or in the basement.

He has started saying "we will talk about this later" jokingly and that is suppose to mean that I will be getting spanked or disciplined in some form.  However he has never acted on that yet.

 7.) What's something you'd like to cross off your spanking bucket list? Being shy is not an option here people. ;)
I don't have a spanking bucket list, however I am worried one day he will get a leather belt or bigger paddle, or if I really, really, really cross a line use a non spanking discipline that will totally humiliate me.   (He has said he has no intentions of doing that but nothing is off the table)

 8.) Someone comes to you, and says they just started practicing domestic discipline. What's the biggest piece of advice you can give them?

To go with it!  Enjoy it!  Enjoy the reward it brings.  For the Man to be FIRM and consistent!  For the wife to be submissive as hard as it may be.  Believe me, I know!  I get plenty of spankings when we do our "submission exercise" if you will.  

9.) Where is the craziest place you've been spanked?

I guess in the garage bent over the car?  Not crazy! He has swatted my butt in public kinda playing and kinda being serious.  Kinda embarrassing!  LOL

10.) We talked about a spanking bucket list, now let's get a little more into it.. what about a BDSM style bucket list? What's something you'd like to cross off of that?
We are not into BDSM.

 11.) Is there a punishment you thought you'd never try, but ended up trying and finding effective?

Corner time totally nude.  Or when he tells me no panties!  I never thought that wearing no panties at his demand would accomplish anything, but it does.  Sometimes he will tell me no panties just because and there is no reason other than that's what he wants and it keeps me thinking about him. The simple fact of just obeying and submission.  At the same time he has used it as discipline before.  He sent me a text and told me to take my panties off and leave them off until certain chores were done.  To make sure I listened he had me take a picture of my panties that I had taken off. 

 12.) What is something you wish you knew before you started DD/TTWD?

How much closer it would make us.  How it would make me soft, gentle, feminine, submissive and give the respect to my husband he deserves and that I would see him in such control and him being a true MAN!

13.) If you could take a break from one rule, for one week, which rule would it be?

 That I can have a few glasses of wine when I want and not have to ask first.

14.) This might sound like a no brainer at first, but really think about it. If you could only have one sort of spanking in your dynamic, would you rather it be discipline or fun?

I'd choose discipline.  The discipline satisfies an emotional and psychological need of mine, and in turn makes our marriage happier and gives my husband the control he should have in our marriage.

15.) If your HOH/Spanker messed up, and offered to let you spank them, would you? Why/Why not?

No way. I think it would leave me unsettled and feeling "off."  Even if he messed up and I shot off at the mouth about it, I would expect him to discipline me for disrespect even though he messed up.

16.) What is your favorite form of aftercare?

 

The closeness it brings.  I can melt into him.  And of course sometimes, not all the time, we make love and that is really nice.

 17.) How was DD/spanking brought up to you, or how did you bring it up to your partner?

Its something I read about many, many years ago and my HOH was not interested at that point.  I don't think he realized that we needed it and I didn't either to the extent we did.  But after we almost ended in divorce I brought it back to his attention and we went for it. 

18.) If your spanker could use only one implement from here on out, what would they use?

Wooden paddle or belt...it's a toss up.

19.) Do you have a favorite pair of panties to wear when you know you're going to be spanked? If so, what are they?

I'm not allowed to wear clothes when I'm being disciplined.  He either makes me undress or he undresses me.

 20.) Unfortunately/fortunately (depending on how you look at it) mind reading hasn't yet been perfected. What's something you want your HOH/Dom/Spanker to know? (For example, don't be afraid to spank harder, or something along those lines.) Don't be afraid, spill!

I know you do this because you love me, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell you really how much that means to me. Always be firm with me, and don't be afraid to make me cry.  I need your firmness and to know I can not walk all over you.  And if I do you have no issue with beating my butt and if I fight you on it, forcibly spanking me.



*Bonus Question (just because it's fun)- Is there a picture (spanking, dd, Ds, etc related) that you just really love? If so, let's see it!*

I have a few... He has her in a position that she can't fight him on.  You can also see that he has enforced full nudity with the discipline.



 

 

This one because I have been in this position and its quick to strip any attitude and it is effective! It enforces humility really fast!

 

Then this one is my FAVORITE! To me it reminds me how I feel about my HOH after he has disciplined me. (if disciplined the correct way because if I don't have the attitude depicted in the picture then I don't have the RIGHT attitude)  Complete submission for the HOH!

 

 

Update on TTWD/DD - Thoughts????

We have been very busy lately. 

 

I have been bratting and owner couldn't do anything about it because of our circumstances we've had.

 

It got to a point the other day that I told him that I was done with DD.   Not a good idea!  By the time he got home, I was a bit more kind and told him I was sorry, and I was.   However, while I craved it, I was also trying to get out of it.

 

Due to the lack of consistency, even though I said I was sorry, he went through with what he said he was going to do. 

 

So in the closet I go, forced to undress and bend over. We don't usually do over the knee because we don't have the space in our closet, so it's me on the floor on my knees bent over. (There are times that we go outside to the car in our garage and use the back seat and I am bent over his knees that way) He usually spreads my legs and this last time told me I could not arch my back which made my butt stand out more which I hated.  5 minutes of spanking!  Then I stand up and he sees I still have an attitude, which I did.  I don't know why!  We figure its because the longer we go without any discipline or just maintenance my attitude returns and I forget or push to take control.  Or its just me simply bratting because I know I need it.

 

 

Because of having an attitude still that meant corner time.  Again this is where we practice submission and take away my pride.  I always end up getting spanked a few times because I can never stay still as he touches me.   Its a form of humiliation, not in a bad way, but in a way of remembering that I belong to him and submit to him and obey. 

 

After awhile of me still moving he had me bent back over and spanking my butt again.  After that I told him I was ready to try and be still and submit.

 

I finally stood still and he told me I was being a good girl and "he wants to inspect what belongs to him."

 

"It might be between your legs but it belongs to me"

 

 

 

We do NOT believe in butt plugs and feel it has no place in a DD life style, even in D/s. Though he has joked about enemas before. Umm, NO!  While I would have no control because he is my owner, I would die of embarrassment and would put up a fight. One time he had me grab my ankles and that was so humiliating, because he had my legs spread and everything in view.   However there are times when I am over his knee (when in the car)  or bent over on the floor he will spread my checks and that is horrible! I always squirm and tell him to quit.  Not a good idea! Humiliating! HATE IT!

 

 

 

For you women out there, do you find that you ever crave, or need to feel your rear red?   Do you find that you need it?  Almost like you need the pain on your rear to feel your owners authority over you? 

 

At times I feel like I need to feel the pain, but its a knowing of my owner taking me and putting me in my place and showing me his authority and controlling me.

 

After reading about some things, I feel like at times I am manipulating him into spanking me.  Bratting! I know I am because I feel its what I need. 

 

I also want him to feel his power, his control over me.  I want him to know that he has complete control over me and enjoy his power and authority over me.  I know he does in some respects because he likes to see my rear RED!  A red bottom is a happy husband!

 

Anyone else feel that way? 

 

~Jane

Thank you all!!!

I want to take a moment and thank you all for your comments here on my page with my blog.  As I'm sure most of you know that its a journey that comes up with many questions.  Is this normal, is that normal?  Should I feel this way?  Is it working? 

At times I doubt it and myself.   At times I'm humiliated, at times I'm mad, and then at other times I feel a closeness to him that is not describable, and at times I crave it and need it.   Sometimes it's confusing!

For us, it has saved our marriage!   We had a bad thing happen a while back and it made us evaluate some things. 

It is something that is so meaningful to use that we are going to make some jewelry (bracelets) that has something on it for each of us to help remind us of our place.   We are going to use some sort of letters that nobody will pick up on and if anyone ask we will tell them its between me and owner.  

I looked all over online and there are not many places that make DD/ Ms jewelry!  

But I wanted to say thank you all for your help and comments along the way and I'm sure I will have more in the months to come. 

Long post - rambling

So here I am!  Again!  I hope everyone is doing good!

Over the last week or so I think we figured out that we fit in with not only LDD/ TTWD but also D/s....  

I am the one doing a lot of research on things and my loving owner reads them and applies it as he sees fit. 

He bought a thick spoon about 5 days ago and that spoon hurts!

I got the worse spanking I think Ive ever had a few days ago. I had a bad attitude and was just being disrespectful.  Though I did get all my chores done that day because I knew I was in trouble from the night before.   The closet is usually where I am disciplined in, but he decided we needed more privacy for this spanking.  He told me were going to the basement, and I knew that wasn't good!  He had already told me that I was getting a sound discipline, and again I knew I had it coming.   

We went down to the basement and he told me to strip and took me over his knee and gave me a long hard warm up with the brush.  Then he made me stand up and bend over the chair and then he took his new favorite spanking implement and wore my butt out!   It hurt so bad! 

 Then we came up stairs where I was made to strip again for corner time.    

This is where we practice submission and obedience.  (Submission and obedience is after all what everything stems from in our lifestyle)  I am told to stand still and not move and let him touch me anywhere and however he wants. (Obedience  - "you are going be a good girl and not move? Do you want to make me happy? Then don't move"    Submission - letting go of pride and dignity and letting him touch me where ever and how ever he wants, which also reminds me that I am his)  But if I disobey and squirm even a little I get spanked.   

Well that night while in the corner I got whipped with the belt twice for squirming when he touched me ( yes in vulnerable places  - places that make me lose my pride )   Finally I was able to let go of my pride and let him touch me and belong to him without moving.    When we do this as part of discipline, maintenance, role affirmation, I always end up getting spanked because it takes a lot to let go of that pride and dignity and give it away to my owner.   

Even though I know he loves me and trust him we are living in a world that women are taught that is horrible to "obey" anyone, to have a head of the household and be in submission.  

Are there other ways for submission?  I'm sure there are, but in this kind of situation it is highly effective for us to take away pride and attitude and walls.  Vulnerability needs to set in. 

Spankings hurt and are humiliating!   In our lifestyle we feel and we have seen that humiliation is a big key in DD -D/s loving marriage we have.  To be truly owned you can not have any prideful tendencies as most women do, and having that pride takes you away from submission and in turn obedience. 

My owner also decided the other day due to bring haughty and a bad attitude

(Which I did) that he was going to start using a new position.   I hate, hate it!!!   

A day or so ago I was mouthy and had an attitude again (that's why we have maintenance because I am as most women are, quick to revert back or slip up and usually when I slip up and I'm called out on it, I get mad and it escalates from there) and he pulled me in the closet.  My clothes were removed and the next words out of his mouth horrified me!   "Bend over and grab your ankles" I was shocked and humiliated!  I was resistant but there was no getting out of it.  So I reached down for my ankles then my owner reached down and made me spread my legs.   I was horrified because I was in an embarrassing position, he could see everything and nothing is left to the imagination.  He gave me a few good hard smacks with the spoon and then lectured me about my attitude and that I belong to him.  Then he proceeded with the "submission and obedience" session we do.    

I hate corner time!  (Either in the corner or the new found "bend over and grab your ankles")   It is as embarrassing, if not more embarrassing than when I'm spanked!  Both are horrible, yet understandably needed.   

Being in a truly submissive state makes a woman feel truly like she owned by the man she loves and who loves her.   

Submission either by want or by force IS erotic!  Yes it is discipline, and spankings  hurt badly, its embarrassing and humiliating, and it IS for bad behavior or role affirmation, but regardless of the reason it draws the husband and wife closer.  The husband is SHOWING you his authority of you by his power.  The bond is so much stronger.  I know for any discipline I receive, I hate it and everything that goes with it.  I hate it early on in the day when Ive done something and I know Im getting a spanking and corner time when my owner gets home.  However 99% of the time after Discipline or reinforcement I feel better, I feel closer to my owner.  But by being submissive it draws out more of the woman's softer side, her feminine side, the side of her that is submissive to her owner that she shows respect, obedience, and submission to.  That is what makes it erotic, that closeness you feel and giving yourself over to your owner in heart and body, knowing that he knows you inside and out.   

From my research is not uncommon for women to get "wet" from discipline even when their butt is on fire and they are so embarrassed by the position that are in and they  just want to hide in a hole somewhere.   I know I do and that in of itself is so, so, so humiliating.  My owner can see and feel it and it embarrasses me so much!  He won't let me wipe myself off, he takes a cloth and wipes me because its part of the discipline.   Again, it's part of taking that rotten attitude away, taking that pride away by reminding me that everything I have and my body belongs to him.  Now there is nothing wrong with pride, it just doesn't need to come with attitude and towards your owner.

With all that being said, I am very strong willed, a loud mouth, hard headed and don't listen according to my owner.   I know he has his hands full with me!   You would think with all the spankings and corner time of embarrassment I would learn, it would be a deterrent from my rotten attitude and my sassy mouth.  I think at times it is, because I do think sometimes before I speak, even though he doesn't think so,  but other times I fly off the handle, I don't care and I get this "whatever" attitude.  At that point I realized I crossed a line and I know I'm in trouble so I'm like "so what".  Or one of the biggest things I do, and I don't know how my owner will fix this issue is that I question everything he tells me to do or not do.  Everything!  Plus I grew up in a house and for a good part of our marriage being allowed to get attitude, get my way, be sarcastic, and use a nasty tone of voice, and say what I wanted to say.  There are just some things that are part of my personality.  My owner says he is going to fix that.  LOL 

We have only been with this lifestyle maybe 6 months and hubby went from scared to spank me and backing down from me and my attitude and only giving me 4 little pops with the spoon to a man who has fully embraced this lifestyle, a man who doesn't put up with any crap and gives me to do list that has to be done, rules, and will redden my butt so bad and put me in corner time and shows me his authority over me.  He shows me that I belong to him, and that I'm allowed to be a strong woman with life but when its all said and done all decisions and how things are done, my well-being, and my body is his to do as he wishes.   

For me being a "brat" my entire life, this is taken some getting used to, hence why I always in trouble. (I can't catch a break because if I'm not in trouble for bad behavior, or not showing respect.... So forth and so on.... There is role affirmation of maintenance) 

I wish we would have found this lifestyle early on in our marriage!  It has made us closer! It has made life easier.  You can't have two people running a household.  One has to run it and the other do as they are told to make everything run easier in life.  

New Rules and Owner likes a red bottom

 

 

 

This pictures says a thousand words! 

I think most husbands, once they embrace the DD, TTWD, D/s Lifestyle enjoy seeing our bottoms RED!   The might not like having to do it, but I think they do like judging the color and looking at their "handy" work. 

 

 

 

Whatever the reason, be it because of displeasure, not obeying, back talking, or simply just because they want to,  knowing that it will keep the marriage strong and reminder of who has authority and who is in control they find enjoyment from it in that respect.

 

 

My owner finally put together a new list of rules. 

Not going to be fun!

 

I already know I'm in trouble for today. 

 

As much as I hate it, find it embarrassing, and yet at the same time find it a turn on, (which is embarrassing alone)  I KNOW its needed.  For some reason my body, my brain needs it.  I need the accountability,  someone who is not afraid to stand up to me,  someone is not afraid to say "Ok, get up and go to the closet" for no reason at all and blister my rear!  In my brain it resets me, it is a stress relief, and sometimes I feel like the pain that I feel when I'm being spanked is what gives me that relief!  I think it takes my mind off of things that is bothering me when I'm on overload.

 

DD, TTWD, D/s lifestyle is a wonderful way for us.

 

So while I get what I need (even when I'm trying to talk him out of spanking me) I feel owner gets satisfaction for one spanking me and watching my butt turn red, (when we first started I don't think he liked it that much but as he has fully embraced it, I see it in him) and  two the results that come out of our lifestyle.

 

~Jane DDLearning

 

 

Embarrassment and humiliation??? Anyone else? Erotic but yet discipline?

 

 

It has been awhile since I've posted here!  I hope everyone is doing great! 

 

 Things have been going well!   We have stayed on the DD path most of the time, but at times have had to put it on the back burner due to family issues that didn't allow us to do practice DD. 

 

When that happened we can/could really tell a big difference in our marriage! 

 

Recently we have had some long talks about getting our schedules back on track and making sure DD is well and alive in our marriage because it brings us so much closer!

 

Maybe you all can help me out with a few questions I have that I have also asked my dear owner about. 

 

What is the difference between DD and D/s? 

 

For some reasons while DD is painful, VERY painful and I don't want it, there is another part of me that does and that part finds it erotic.   Sometimes the spankings hurt so badly I can't keep still and I'm crying but yet sexual turned on?  Does anyone else have that issue? Or know why?

 

Which brings me to this next question when I'm being disciplined, corner time, in humiliating positions to help humble me or knock a chip off my shoulder, again I hate it because its so embarrassing, but it turns me on?  An example of this was recently dear owner had already spanked me and it wasn't enough, so I had to go in the closet and take off all my clothes and get on all 4 and he spread my legs and he spanked me.  To assert his authority he would rub on my bottom and I'm not suppose to move to show submission. (not in a sick way - but in a way to make him know that I am submitting and I'm his and I'm not going to fight him.)  The reason for this is because that is a humiliating position and it reduces my attitude and takes away pride that I am carrying around. (for me it works because when I tell him to stop or I squirm I get spanked more but usually by the time I not fighting him my attitude is gone and I'm in a better mood and very submissive)  For me it works because its so embarrassing because he can see everything and I can't move because its in the middle of discipline.  However what is embarrassing about it also is that it is making me "wet" and him feeling that or seeing that is embarrassing and humiliating.  Does that happen to anyone else?  Don't get me wrong, I hate it because of the embarrassment but it does work for my attitude or reminding me that I am his wife and my role in our marriage and who has authority. 

 

That also goes for corner time.  I have to stand there either naked or with my panties down and occasionally he will come up and touch me and if I move or say stop and swats my butt a few times really hard, and he will come back later and he tries again and I finally submit and by that time my attitude is gone and I am in back where I need to be and I feel like a better person.  Embarrassing!  So embarrassing but yet it also makes me "wet" and its so humiliating that my dear owner sees this and feels this.

 

*Please keep in mind that hubby only does these things because he has seen that it is what works with me.  When I have an attitude or need our roles reaffirmed, it takes the embarrassment and humiliation to bring me down, along with spankings. 

 

Is this degrading to what DD is about?  TTWD?  LDD?  Does this happen to other women?

 

Or does this qualify as D/s????? 

 

Thank you all so much for your support and answers that are to come!  I love it that I have a place I can come and blog and talk freely about these things!  Thank you!

 

~Jane

I've been staying in trouble! :(

I can't even begin to tell you how many spankings I have gotten!

Yesterday I started with gettin sassy in a text message and his response was "Panties off NOW".... /sigh  Plus the last 2 days prior to that Ive been havin to write lines......

Last night HOH had me do corner time, panties dropped to the floor and he makes sure my shirt is up high enough and if its not he comes and spanks my rear and pulls it up again, he seems to want my butt on display as much as it can be.......... Then I got discipline for having a "wall" up and being distant...... and then for havin a bratty attitude the night before, then I got maintence. 

He told me Im getting maintence every night until further notice. 

Then this morning I still had a wall up and because of that and for some other reason he had me in the closet, panties down with the hair brush.   :(   

Then when we came back to bed he said I still had a attitude and I did....... and I told him that he is still leaving me in control.  He was quiet for a few mins, and then he said "You know what, you are not in control anymore."  He grabbed me by my wrist firmly took me again into the closet, told me to pull down my panties in a firm voice and this time gave me a good hard sound spanking that I had no control over, I didn't know when he was going to stop even tho I was starting to move around.  After he was done, still in a firm voice, he told me to pull my panties up and took me again firmly by the wrist and walked me to the bed and told me to get back in bed.   I asked if I could go to the bathroom and he said "you can in a little bit." So after we talked for a few more minutes he asked me if I really had to go to the bathroom again, and I was doomed!  Because I didn't really have to go, it was my way of still acting out, I guess.   So because of lying to show out, even though I was acting alot better, another trip into the closet and I got it with the hair brush AGAIN! 

He then informed me that NOW we are doing maintenance in the morning and at night.

However we are seeing HUGE improvement though!!!!!!!!  The other day I finally got EVERYTHING on my chore list done, and in the time fame he wanted them done!   I was so proud of myself and he was proud of me also!    Finally I was able to stick to a schedule, and work on my time managment.

Even after this mornings spanking(s)....... Im in for more tonight because I have already broke one rule which is discipline which mean a spanking and corner time..... and then maintenance.   

My poor red glowing butt!   But I wouldn't change a thing!   DD has brought us so much closer!  It is helping me in so many areas of my life and our marriage.   The only thing I would change is hubby  gettin more firm with me, and I want him to be!   I love him so much for that!   I NEED that! Yet, he is very loving and always kissing me and holding me.......  

Jane   ~~~ Madly in love with Tarzan

Why is it?

Can someone explain to me, which I have a strong idea myself and from things Ive read, but I would like others thoughts..............Can someone explain why if the HOH of the house makes me stand in the corner naked, legs spread apart and hand on your head after and/or during the spanking for a break it has such a power effect?   It is a turn on, yes.... but also very embarrassing.  Why is it you feel so much more submissive tho?   Its like a package deal?

Also, why is it when HOH tells you to not wear panties for the day, it makes you feel............. I don't know the words for it.................Anyone else know what Im saying?    Like today...... Hubby told me no panties......

Can anyone explain these to me?  

I know how I feel but trying to figure out how to word it and if the way I feel is like anyone else?   Other HOHs and wives feel free to answer!!!!!  Please! 

~Jane

Spanking Survey I found

SPANKING SURVEY

Have you ever gotten spanked?     YES!

Are you spanked bare bottomed, over panties, or over clothes?  Bare Bottom

What is the best thing about being spanked? It makes me feel loved and cared - it makes me feel submissve and lets my husband exercise his authority over me when Ive done something that needs correcting.  But it also keeps me vulnerable and feminine for the man I trust, it reinforces our roles in our marriage.

What position do you get spanked in?    However, my husband desires to give me a spanking I will submitt.  Usually its me bending all the way over.  Tho I have been OTK, and a few times over the hood of the car in our garage b/c of company.

Have you ever gotten spanked in public? No

What do you get spanked with the most? Rubber Hair Brush

On a scale of 1-10 how much does the average spanking hurt?  It varies

Have you ever gotten spanked with a hairbrush? Yes

Have you ever been spanked so hard that you started to cry?  Yes

Were you spanked as a child? No, not really.

Do you think spanking is fun?  I do at times find it erotic, but when it comes down to pulling down my panties and bending over..... Then its not erotic.

Have you ever gotten spanked for bad driving (speeding ticket, etc)?  No.

Have you ever gotten a spanking for no reason at all?   Yes, maintenance in our household is for many reasons, but one of those reasons is if my HOH decides it just needs to be done just as a reminder or to just put me in a feminine mood, more submissive.  Or flat out just because..... Just b/c he feels its due.

Have you ever gotten spanked by a teacher? No

Is your butt spankable?  It must be.
Are you currently in trouble?   Probably, hubby keeps asking me if I did something when he told me to, by a certain time frame and I keep ignoring the question and answering with other things.

Do you get lectured during the spanking? No, not during.  But like last night, he wanted to make sure I knew why.

Have you ever seen someone else get spanked? Not as an adult.

Have you ever gotten spanked for cursing? No

Have you ever gotten spanked for lying? No

Have you ever been spanked with more than one spanking instrument in one spanking session?   Yes.... Hairbrush, wooden spoon, blind rod, and hand

Do you hate spankings?  It is a very strong love/hate relationship with it.  I know I need it, it has helped.  It has made our marriage so much stronger!   It was what we both needed.

How many people spank you? Just my husband.

Have you ever gotten spanked with your butt in the air?  I suppose.

Have you ever gotten spanked so hard your butt was purple?  Bruised

Do you think that spanking is a good punishment?  I view it as discipline.  And yes!  However, corner time also sucks.

Do you believe spanking has made your relationship better, or worse? Definitely better.

Is your butt red and sore afterwards?  Yes.  HOH likes to see it glow red.



Have you ever gotten spanked with a sneaker? No

Have you ever been spanked twice in one day?  Yes

Have you ever asked to be spanked for something you did wrong?  Yes.  Ive also asked for maintenance, however HOH usually knows when I need both.
Would you talk about spousal spankings to your friends/family members?   No.  Is it because Im ashamed?  NO!  But I doubt they would understand.   It not like its a secret, but rather its something private between me and my HOH.

 
Have you ever gotten you butt caned? No.

Have you ever gotten spanked with a wooden spoon? Yes.

What do you get spanked for?  Lots of reasons.

On average, how many times a month are you spanked?  Just about every day, or every other day.

Do your friends know that you get spanked?  No

.
On a 1-10 scale, how hard would you get spanked for something serious,such as speeding?  it varies.  Sometimes not so hard and therefore doesn't have that much of an effect and usually leads to a spanking later.  The harder and longer he goes the more of an impression it makes and resets my thinking and takes away my control and makes me more submissive and vunlnerable to my husband, which makes me for feminine for him and give him the respect he deserves.

Have you ever gotten your butt belted?  No

Have you ever gotten your butt paddled? No

After your spanking is over, how long before you repeat the same offense?  Every day it seems, but slowly, VERY slowly we are seeing benefits in some of the correction my HOH sees I need to make.

Does your spouse enjoy spanking you?  He likes seeing my butt glow I think.....Does he get off on it?  I dont think so, but he does enjoy after it when I feel like I melt into him and I am at his mercy and he has taken away my pride and spanks me back into submission, and vulnerable to him.

When is the last time you got spanked?  Embarrassing corner time and yes spanking.

Have you ever spanked yourself?  No.

What is the worst thing about being spanked?  Pulling down my panties in front of my husband.   Its embarrassing and then bending over.   However again, this DOES serve a STRONG purpose!  Submissive, feminine, vulnerable and remembering our roles.

How long does the spanking last? It varies, tho they seem to be getting longer and harder.

Do you like to be spanked?  See above.

Would you describe yourself as a rule follower, or a rule breaker?  Both!!!!  No doubt!  I have to have rules as HOH and I have figured out, it is important in our marriage..... However Im always breakin them it seems........... but slowly.......... things are getting better and Im learning..... Discipline has helped a lot.....  and the connection we share.......